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Post  Mark on Tue Mar 20, 2012 11:50 pm

Great link from SociallyPositive.Com

What is Self Consciousness?

It’s a feeling of vulnerability and exposure where you think you are weaker and under threat while there is one or more others observing you who to you are in a stronger or more powerful position.

At least that is what you are subconsciously believing when you are Self Conscious.

Self Consciousness is uncomfortable at the least, scary, upsetting, and traumatizing at the worst.

When you are Self Conscious you believe others or another person is judging you.

You may feel vulnerable, alone, weak, exposed, judged, small, object-like, disrespected, under threat, invalidated, panicked, afraid, scared, traumatized, targeted, ashamed, non-existant, uncared for, uncared about, and alarmed.

Self Consciousness may cause you to “leave your body” and observe yourself as if you are conducting a performance with your own body. This can be really painful and exhausting.

You may be acutely aware of every tiny movement of your body. Because of this you may then move or act in a tense, serious, uncomfortable un-natural way. For example you may swing your arms you think too highly or think you did some small action too loudly. This makes everything alot worse and makes you think others are judging you even worse now.

This is awful – no-one deserves Self Consciousness!

Examples of Self Conscious Scenarios:

Walking into a classroom or Conference room past people that are already sitting down.
Being on stage in front of an audience.
Walking up to or past someone when you are not sure what they are focused on for whatever reason.
Walking up to or past someone when you are in better light than them and they are in the dark more than you so you don’t know where they are looking or what they are focused on.
Being by yourself – alone in a social setting when other people are in groups of more than one person.

Self Consciousness may be linked to Shyness. You may be afraid to look at someone or look them in the eye or think it’s impolite and wierd to do so. But as a consequence now you are unsure if they are looking at you or how they are looking at you. This can cause self consciousness. The solution may be then to observe your surroundings more and look at people more to be aware of what they are focused on. If someone is staring at you and doesn’t stop – it means they are inappropriate, not you – they are more deserving of self consciousness for their beingness right now – not you!!!

YOU are not wierd or being or acting or walking wierdly – If people are watching you and judging you for simple walking to various locations in a house, school, office, or shopping centre – THEY are the one that is being wierd, unkind, and inappropriate!!!!!

If someone is observing you closely without stopping and judging you as you do this THEY are the one being inappropriate, unkind, and wierd.

If they are looking at you because they think you are attractive that’s probably something light, funny, silly, harmless, and something not to worry about. But if they only think you are attractive when you are behaving unnaturally – putting on a tense, rigid, exhausting performance where you have to suck your stomach in and act in a certain way, conducting your own performance – turn your back to that stupid dumb idea of attractiveness. Only accept ideas of attractiveness that find you attractive when you are natural and when you are just being your natural NON-Performance self. THAT is the only concept of attractiveness worthy of you.

When you are self conscious it’s like you feel guilty. Self Consciousness might be related to really low self esteem or paranoia, or the belief that the people around you don’t care about you and wouldn’t even care if you were hurt.

You believe people are intensely judging you.

It’s just paranoia. You are not being watched or judged in a threatening way!!!! There’s NOTHING about you that is guilty! You can be assured that the vast majority of people are only kindly and generously accepting towards and about you no matter how you are walking or doing a task!!!!

Also, you are absolutely and completely free to walk, eat, change position in a chair, or do something or a task as oddly as you want when other people are right next to you and near you. You have such vast freedom. You are free for people to think and feel ANYTHING about you or towards you!

It’s pretty funny if people rigidly and strangely think that you are not free to be wierd or different, cross your legs in a jerky way while sitting, have food dribble down your face unintentionally as you take a bite, say spontaneous funny things to people like they are a friend, work looking average, go shopping looking ugly, go to a certain public location, shop, school, or party just because they don’t like you or don’t want you there, or stand or sit by yourself for half an hour or even the whole day at a social setting.

If people are THAT focused upon you, it’s actually pretty funny – that they are scrutinizing your performance on these dumb, small things so intensely but you can “perform” very strangely and imperfectly because you don’t care about their strange judgmentalness, and they will be shocked and have to give up on you performing the way they want.

That makes you see that no-one like that exists, and if they do, they obviously have OCD about small insignificant things about other people and probably are not doing too well in their life from their strange focused obsessions about extremely minor movements and acts by people such as you.

It’s pretty funny if people don’t think you’re free to be yourself!!

Self Consciousness tells you you’re in Danger. You’re not. You’re not in danger at these times and in these situations and you actually have absolutely no damaged or lowered chances of Survival, Being Successful, or Being Liked, Cared For, Included, and Accepted by many people. You are free to be hated and disliked.


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